Honourable mention to Mike Gunn for delivering one of my recent favourite put downs:
Spoiler (click to reveal)
Mike: Hello, my name is Michael and I have a sister named Wendy. Heckler: I know her. Mike: Really? Heckler: Yes, I've shagged her. Mike: Well, I'd keep quiet about it if I were you; she's only seven.
Owned. Completely owned. Doesn't matter what's true (although I should hope the latter two statements aren't at the same time! ), there is nothing that heckler can say that will let them bounce back from that with any dignity at all.
And now I've offended absolutely everyone in the entire world.
You proceed from a false assumption. I am a Vulcan. I have no ego to bruise.
What is your favourite colour when playing a boardgame? Spring, Summer, Autumn or Winter? Do you play an instrument? If yes, which one and for how long already? Having fun? What would have been your name if it wasn't the name you have? What is your favourite snack? What is your favourite day of the week? What is your favourite time of day? What character would you be in a Star Trek setting? What makes you "tick" (inspires you, why do you get up in the morning)? What is your life-long dream? What is your favourite RPG race/class? If you could go back in time - where and when would you go? Could you enlighten us about your avatar? Where does your username come from?
What is your favourite colour when playing a boardgame?
Favourite colours are black, green and red. No major preference amongst those three.
Spring, Summer, Autumn or Winter?
Spring. Used to be Summer because of my Birthday and the holidays, but it's now Spring because the season has lighter nights and more moderate temperatures than Winter, without the hayfever and sweatiness of Summer.
Do you play an instrument? If yes, which one and for how long already?
Certainly more than last time, yep! We'll gloss over the facts that I'm on the tail end of a cold, at the start of a busy week and - in a move unbecoming of the VGGeek GotW - not playing much.
What would have been your name if it wasn't the name you have?
What is your favourite snack?
Salt and vinegar crisps.
What is your favourite day of the week?
The one where I do really well at my games! Games I'm on a break from, kinda...
What is your favourite time of day?
The early morning of a day off, whether it's the bluish sunrise of 4 AM on a Summer morning, or the relative quietness of, say, 10. It's just me and my games, and it is good!
What character would you be in a Star Trek setting?
What makes you "tick" (inspires you, why do you get up in the morning)?
No idea. I suppose I am inspired by knowledge? At least, driven by the idea of retaining knowledge and facts, and expressing them to others so as to seem "knowledgeable", "clever", or like some kind of expert authority.
As for getting up in the morning? That'll be neighbours. Not the soap opera.
What is your life-long dream?
Uh... Not sure!
Nothing remotely feasible in this world, I can tell you that!
What is your favourite RPG race/class?
I have no racial preferences. As for class... I'll play whatever, although I think I like fighting classes best. Depends on the game: with JRPGs I'll favour proper warriors, defense over agility; with other games I like the idea of being some sort of jack-the-lad, roguish swashbuckler clad in light armour, who deep down is a good and ultimately heroic person. JRPGs I don't care particularly for ranged weapons, other games I'll use them.
Just to confuse proceedings, a couple of years back I did some "What does your real life character sheet look like?" quiz (that I discovered by being on this very site!) and I'm a wizard. So...
If you could go back in time - where and when would you go?
Glasgow c. 1993. Idle curiosity as to what the early 90s looked like in comparison to the more pessimistic modern day, in the city I am in. I suspect very f**king similar, but with less smartphone zombies.
Could you enlighten us about your avatar?
It's some image I think I found somewhere on Steam or... something. Not that I care, but I think it has something to do with Dota 2? Um...
I was looking for something "badass" and / or involving Dragons, and when I found that image (probably just from Google image searching), I felt it was the perfect fit!
Where does your username come from?
Years ago I was planning some daft crime story involving hackers - the story never came to be. The antagonist used the screen name "Jackal2k". I believe I took the word "Jackal" from Far Cry 2, and "2k" not from the games company, but as a reference to Y2K. I'm not sure why / when I lower-cased the k. It may have been to avoid reference to the company.
Fast forward to me setting up my profile, I thought about the name, it seemed "cool" to me, so I just went with it.
Oh, that's a tough one. I like many games of different genres, but trying to make a "one size fits all" would probably be a mess.
Nevertheless, I'm thinking my "dream game" would be some sort of addictive timesink RPG with elements of various other genres. It would have:
- An interesting, expansive combat system full of combos and stylish moves; - An impressive character creation system with plenty of options for appearance and background; - Apparel and armour selection and customisation that would put, say, The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind, and The Sims games to shame; - Lots of opportunities to create things: items, buildings, interior designs, towns, dungeons, levels, characters, quests... - Lots of variety; - Bright, crisp, colourful graphics; - An excellent soundtrack alternating between Chrono Trigger levels of beauty and heavy metal awesomeness; - A huge open world where you can go anywhere, do anything, kill whoever or just mess around in taverns and stores; - An upbeat main story with humorous moments and a happy ending; - The opportunity to take my character through life: see them age, gain acceptance, improve their lot, become increasingly popular, famous and influential, systematically improve all aspects of the world through their adventures, let them settle down... - Fantasy preferred (maybe something slightly more exotic, some kind of tropical archipelago with slight Morrowind-like weirdness), but some sort of fantasy / sci-fi mishmash would be interesting too.
Essentially, if someone could mash Morrowind, Skyrim, the Fable series, The Sims 3, Minecraft, the Soulcalibur series, Dungeons and Dragons, Divinity Original Sin II, Arkandian Crusade, Shenmue II, Super Mario Odyssey, Saints Row The Third, Pirates! and Chrono Trigger into the above, that would be the best!
Now I just have to: A) be disappointed this theoretical game will never come into existence; B) figure out if Tony Hawk, Doom and Guitar Hero sequences would improve the game further (minigames, maybe?), or lasershark it. Same with comic book panel cutscenes and time travel.